Tuesday, March 20, 2018

Challenge as a working mom (First time mom)

Now that we're into more than 3 months I'm back at work, I'll just list down the challenges I faced so far and probably can be a hindsight to decide whether it's a good choice to be a working mom or not? (This is just based on my situation anyway, so it's still up to each family to decide theirs).

Finding babysitter

Or should it be finding a trusted and affordable babysitter. I don't like the idea of having the parents/parents in law taking care of our baby. They can play with the baby, but please leave the parenting roles to the parents' responsibility. It may be a little cliche, getting a babysitter is different in the sense that we're then the boss. We get to say what we want for our baby rather than our parents telling us what we should do and be unhappy when we don't want to do it. It hurts the relationship. Just saying. If anyone feels it's alright for the grandparents to take care, by all means, go ahead.

Not enough sleep

This is definitely a challenge. Jacob wakes up in the middle of the night for feeding (and still do!) every two hourly. Not getting to fall into deep sleep and having to work a full day the next day is indeed tiring. But now that we've come into 3rd month of this, I'm starting to get a hang of it. But of course, this probably has affected my memory. I think it has gotten worse.

Breastfeeding

I'm still breastfeeding Jacob up until now. Therefore, at those times where he's at the babysitter's, I'll have to express the milk. My challenge is that I'll have to walk quite a distance to the public nursing room since there's no nursing room in my office building. I'll have to do it in a schedule too otherwise it'll hurt the milk production. It's awkward for me to get out of my work position since there's only a few of us in the office (thank goodness for understanding colleagues) and to get out of my work positions means I'll be spending less hours at work. That means I'll need to double up my work speed after that. It's brain frying.

Working hours

Since Jacob is with the babysitter, I'll have to fetch him after work. That being said, I'll have to leave work earlier/cut off time to make it on time to the babysitter. Of course this should be negotiated with the babysitter in the early days. I'm sure there can be an agreement somehow.

Taking time off for check up

I can only afford to go for morning appointments at the clinic so that I could save my leave for rainy days. Each time a check up I would take half day off for it. We go for government clinic for the check up (the price to pay when it's free). The wait will be long usually. Like I have to be there at 7:30am for 8am appointment, but I can only finish at 10am if lucky.

I have flexible working hours, but I'll still have to work a full 40 hours a week if I don't take half day off. So arriving at work at 11am will means I'll have to work till 8pm. That is too late to fetch Jacob after. 

No time for chores

I thank my mother in law for this. She settles most of the house chores for us. She cooks dinner and does the laundry for us. Otherwise, it would be so time pressing for me to cook for dinner so I bet it's going to be eat out most of the days though I can always do laundry on weekends.

Missing your little one

This is no doubt the biggest challenge. I'm constantly missing my baby while I'm at work. My biggest regret would/may be that I don't get to experience his progress first hand. Like if he suddenly manage to talk or walk or roll over (still trying to get him to roll from back to tummy), I don't get to experience this. I'll only got to know from the babysitter. Initially I'll always be worried if the babysitter can take good care of Jacob. But seeing how she treats Jacob with so much love, I feel better. She buys things for Jacob to play and even new clothes for him.


That's all the challenges I can think of thus far. Of course, it's not all that bad. Since I'm at work, I can actually have a little me-time. I can go do grocery shopping, have lunch in normal pace and run errands. I'm not saying I've abandon the responsibility of taking care of Jacob. It's just a nice off time.

For everything, I totally appreciate the helps I got from my husband for being so understanding. He look after Jacob at home while I wash up the pump bottles and take a bath.

Here's the latest picture of Jacob!